The best advice I ever got… Be your number one fan

The best advice I ever got… Hmm! It is really hard to narrow down to one piece of advice after 25 years of living. Man, I have lived on this planet for a quarter century… That’s a whole lot of living.

I have received advice from so many exemplary people in my life. People I have never seen to people I am lucky to call my dear friends.

But all those combined, cannot surpass the amount of advice I have received from my father. Not my heavenly Father but my earthly dad, I still read my Bible (don’t trip). The man who raised me, stood by me and still does to this very day. I count him as a blessing every morning to have such an exemplary man as my father. For he just doesn’t talk, but he lives by action.

on this day

I am penning down this piece of article after being motivated by a few things on my Facebook timeline. First this flashback I wrote in 2012, thanks to Facebook’s “On this day” tool.

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Next, is this article by Carla Papas of the Merrymaking Sisters.


I love how Carla explains in very few words on why we should be grateful and content for what we have and the stage we are in our lives.

It got me thinking on how we can let jealousy and ego get in the way of us experiencing and enjoying our own story.

Unlike her, the best advice I ever got in my life has got to be with from my beloved, crazier than I am mother.

I think it was about a decade ago and as a teenager, you have all this messed up hormones, know it all attitude and seven degrees of hell you carry every waking moment for anyone who dares to cross by your streets.

starting small doesn't mean thinking small

Oh yeah!! And this was around the time I realized guys found me pretty and girls too. And not just one or two. Dang! My ego got quite some boosting in those days.

I recall cursing around the house and slamming doors, drawers and everything along my path on this fateful day.

Truth be told, it was a wrong day to have a temper.

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My mum was having one of her own as well. She was simply fed up with this grown pretend know it all teen.

Next thing I know, I was literally thrown out of the house. Not just the house the compound. I remember living the gate and not knowing where to go. It was so terrible, because I was raised in a community. Where if anyone found you loitering in the streets, they would ask why you are by yourself.


And no 14 year old wants the embarrassment of narrating why they were kicked out of the house. Well, no one from where I grew up.

So I sat outside the gate and waited. In my head, my mum made me wait the whole day. In truth, I was outside for just an hour. It was after an hour that my mum sent the gateman to go find me.

Later that evening, my mum came to talk to me. I recall her saying…

You need to learn to be your number one fan. When I say “Be your number one fan”, I mean being OK with your life choices and what you are doing even if no one else agrees with you. Not for you to be mean and selfish and believe that the world rotates around you.

It was around that moment, I started caring more of what impact I could have rather than simply allowing life to happen to me.

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And a decade later, that message has changed how I relate with my work and relationships. I was in luck because I got to surround myself with some really awesome people on my life journey.

best advice

And for the sake of sanity. I wasn’t abused or harassed. Outside our main compound and gate we had an extra 150 meters of a beautiful and well maintained garden. Had around 2-5 trees and surrounded by a mini fence of bougainvillea plant.